Four years ago, I discovered I was pregnant. It was an accident...

By anonymous on 04/04/2007
Four years ago, I discovered I was pregnant. It was an accident and we are still not sure how it happened because we were so careful. Having a baby wasn't an option. My boyfriend and I didn't live together. I was at uni and about to start my finals. I estimated that I was 7 weeks.

I went to the family planning clinic near my boyfriend’s house. Because I was registered with a GP in another area, they wouldn't help me. They said I had to go where I lived. I was devastated. So we checked out advice on the internet through sites like this. I found a private clinic in my boyfriend’s home town that could see me the next day. That did mean we had to pay nearly £400 but my boyfriend didn't want me to go through it alone.

The clinic was very friendly and professional. I had counselling to make sure I was ready and two days later I went back for the tablets for a medical termination. A lot of the literature says that you have vaginal pessaries that carry out this job but I had to take oral tablets. I had already had the tablet that softens the cervix and detaches the pregnancy. I took the tablets and on the way home I started feeling sick. My boyfriend pulled over and I threw up! I went back to the clinic because I was so worried that I wouldn't have digested the tablets properly and that I would have to come back and have it done again. My first exam at uni was in 2 days. The clinic staff said I would be fine, enough time had elapsed for the tablets to start working.

We got home. The cramping pains started. I had never experienced a painful period so didn't know what to expect but it sort of felt like mini contractions. This is how the uterus gets the pregnancy out. Lots of clots of blood. A very weird feeling. I took pain killers and slept. That night I just felt washed out. I was more concerned with revision!

I know I might sound cold but I know that it was the right decision for me and have never regretted it. I went to uni 2 days later for my first exam. It went well. The only thing I found weird was that because I never told anybody, nobody knew. I often wonder what my friends would think of me if they did know! The secret will stay with me and my boyfriend (who is now my husband) and I don’t feel I need to talk to anybody about it. Not everyone is the same though. I had a very supportive man with me who remains supportive and so all we need is each other for this.

I am now nearly 27 and still know that I am not ready to have a baby! If I got pregnant now though, things would be different and I would keep it. But we have changed our contraception method to make sure we are more careful!! I graduated with a 2:2. You can get through it very easily with the right support. Take care of yourself! I hope this helps.

Editor’s note: Thanks for sharing your story. Emotionally, you seem to have coped really well with your abortion and had the support you needed. And regarding the physical aspect of a medical termination, you seem to have done better than others who have written in – it’s good to see how much the experience varies. If, at any time, you find yourself relating differently to your experience for whatever reason, we are here to help.

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