I feel so angry and resentful after my surgical abortion 2 weeks ago

I am 33 yr old woman married with 2 daughters aged 7 months and 5yrs old. I have just undergone a surgical abortion 2 weeks ago and I feel so angry and resentful and it's affecting my relationship with my Husband and my kids.

I found out I was pregnant when my baby was 4 months. It was unplanned and I felt so sad when I found out. I was so ill in the short time I was pregnant that I couldn't even care for my new born daughter.

I talked to my husband about it and we decided to go with termination.

We agreed we will do this together but I feel like am not getting the support from him.

My family is on low income and its hard to make ends meet. Sometimes my 5yr old has no clothes that fit her and during the holiday I can't even take them out for activities. Even a bus fare is hard to find just to go into town for some fun with the kids.

That's why we decided on termination. This decision was not easy for me because I have undergone termination in the past.

Before I gave birth to my daughter I had asked my husband to consider getting a sterilisation to avoid mishaps but he didn't do it. He is now in the process of getting a vasectomy and I feel like he is also angry about that.

Now there's tension in the house and we can't find nice words to say to each other. Even when it comes to housekeeping we are like cats and dogs.

I am really fed up and I am considering leaving him.

The problem is I have nowhere to go and no money to survive on when I leave. I am doing a part time Job which pays me £147.00 a month and I can't feed the kids on that.

Please would you advise me on any of these issues.

This story was sent in on 04/08/2011 and it's been viewed 678 times.

Editor's comment

I am sorry to hear how let down and angry you feel towards your husband. He isn't supporting you following the termination you jointly decided to face together, whilst you were so ill with your unplanned pregnancy.

Unfortunately many women experience strong emotion after an abortion which can have a detrimental impact on their relationship.

Life is financially difficult for you also and you are questioning your future. I think post-abortion counselling would help you work through some of the emotions you have spoken of, such as anger and sadness, and equip you to make future plans. I would encourage you to go to a trained post-abortion advisor who has experience of supporting women struggling like yourself. You can follow this link to find a centre for post abortion support in your area.

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