I will never get this nightmare out of my mind.

By anonymous on 12/01/2014
I am a 26 yr old nursing student and mother of three. I found out I was pregnant in September 2013. I immediately knew I could not keep the baby. I planned for an abortion but all of the clinics in my area charge $500 and I definitely didn't have that.
I found a website online that was supposed to be safe and secure and only charged $100 for medical abortion kit. I assumed that I was less than nine weeks so I ordered the nine weeks or less package. Two pills by mouth and four to insert vaginally.
I followed this procedure exactly as the directions said during the week of thanksgiving. Nothing happened.
I contacted the website and they decided to send me another package for free. I didn't receive it until the second week of January 2014 & by this time I had no idea how far along I was and I guess I was just in too much of denial to check.
The website told me it was still safe to follow through with the abortion according to their calculations. So I began the process all over again. This time it was 8 pills by mouth and 10 inserted vaginally.

I was in excruciating pain with vomiting, fever, chills, and diarrhoea from 8am until 4:30pm when I passed out.

I woke up two hours later to no pain at all. I assumed it didn't work again and prepared to go to the hospital. I went to the restroom to urinate and there it was, hanging halfway out of me. I panicked and tried to pull it out but tissue was literally sliding off the bones. I FREAKED OUT.

I contacted the website but they informed me that I could not go to the hospital because I would go to jail.

I thought the website was safe! I tugged and pulled and basically panicked. It was the most horrific thing I have ever experienced. I was in shock. I paced around for about an hour and sat on the toilet on last time, I pushed with all my might, grabbed onto the bones that were sticking out and pulled downward. There was a pop and bloody water gushed and sprayed EVERYWHERE and the pregnancy forcefully plopped into the toilet. I couldn't look and flushed hoping it wouldn't get stuck. The pieces I was pulling off in the first attempt of removing it were on the floor covered in paper towels and I closed my eyes and threw them into a sack.
I cleaned up the bathroom shaken and weak but I was glad it was over. I, in shock, lied down on the couch just glad that this was over. I contacted the website and they told me that this was all normal. Four hours later I got up to pee and a HUGE HEAVY thing started to come out of me, but got stuck and I had to wiggle my whole body for it to fall out. So much blood was pouring out of me. I assume this was the placenta, which was disheartening because I assumed it had come out earlier with the pregnancy because it was so big, but that couldn't have been true, because here it was. This time my toilet was clogged and it FLOODED my bathroom. There was at least two inches of bloody tissue water covering every inch of my bathroom. Here I was, weak, sick, heartbroken, traumatized, and now cleaning up all of this and trying to unclog the reminisce of my baby from my toilet. I felt barbaric and sick. I again contacted the website and they were no longer responding to me. This was the absolute worst day of my life. Now trying to calculate I was somewhere between 16-18 weeks pregnant, but I was in too much denial to look prior to. I feel like a horrible person. I will never get this nightmare out of my mind. The whole time I thought this website was safe, secure, and legitimate. Turns out it was not. If I try to go to the police about it, I will go to jail because it is considered trying to self induce an abortion. I hope and pray that no one else has to experience what I did.

Editor's Comment

This story sounds like a terrible nightmare and a website like this should be prosecuted. The fact that you were much further on than 9 weeks put your life at risk taking this medication unsupervised. The people who sold you this kit could have been facing a major lawsuit if the abortion was incomplete or you had haemorrhaged. It was totally irresponsible of them to send you a second kit free of charge. I would still encourage you to have a medical check up to make sure that you have no retained products.for post abortion support.

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