I had an abortion three years ago and since then I’ve been pregnant again and had a little girl who is now one and a half.

By anonymous on 07/07/2008
I had an abortion three years ago and since then I’ve been pregnant again and had a little girl who is now one and a half. I’ve never been able to forgive myself for doing it and till this day I still think about it, everyday. Every time I look at my little girl it makes me think about what I took away. I feel as if I destroyed an innocent wee life just because I was too selfish to give up my own life to have a baby. I was only 17 and the last thing I wanted was a baby. I don’t think I actually ever sat down and thought about what I was doing. Once my mind was made it there was no changing it and I’m suffering for it now.

Editor’s note: Thank you for sharing with us…It sounds as if you are really struggling with feelings of regret and guilt most of all. At the time, you probably felt you were making the best decision you could in your circumstances, but didn’t realise how it might make you feel deep down. It’s very likely that your head was telling you one thing and your heart was telling you something else, but the pressure of circumstances, especially being so young, meant that those heart feelings were suppressed. Now your heart is giving you a message loud and clear, isn’t it? And it’s a message of pain.

Three years on, it’s time for you to have some support. There is hope for you to resolve the guilt, be able to let go of the grief and find the forgiveness you need for yourself. Please contact your nearest centre, the helpline or Online Advisor for the help that you need.

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