I’m 17 and fell pregnant three months ago.

By anonymous on 31/03/2009
I’m 17 and fell pregnant three months ago. I guess I expected it really as my boyfriend and I hadn’t been using any types of contraception. I have always wanted a baby of my own from a very young age. When I first fell pregnant I was happy...really worried about my parents reactions though, as I have made life difficult for them in the past and thought this would just be something else they would be ashamed of me for. Better the less I told them.

My mum was neutral about the pregnancy but preferred me to carry on. My dad hated the idea and was sure that I should have an abortion. My boyfriend and I spilt up. He was sleeping around with other girls. I had no idea what to do.

I decided to have an abortion but now a month later I wish I never had an abortion. It was the worst mistake of my life and I don’t know how I am going to cope knowing I did that. I had no idea about abortions before I did it myself - I knew it was suction but that’s all. Now I can’t stop looking and researching abortions. I feel horrible for what I did and can’t stop crying. I really don’t know what to do with myself.

Editor’s note: Thanks for writing in…Your natural instinct appears to be for pregnancy rather than against it, and now having had an abortion, you are suffering with regret, guilt and a sense of loss. It’s difficult to choose to pursue a pregnancy when there is not enough support – the circumstances can seem overwhelming. It sounds as if you are in a great deal of emotional pain about your choice and it’s hard to make any progress when you know it’s a choice you made yourself. It would help you to begin to talk this through with someone who understands those pressures and the emotional problems that can trouble women after abortion. Find out where your nearest centre is and get in touch as soon as you can.

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