I tried to control my guilt & upset knowing abortion was the right decision for us

I found out I was pregnant and was over the moon. Needless to say my boyfriend wasn't. After previously having a termination when I was 19, I was certain that if I got pregnant again I would keep it.

I am self-employed with my boyfriend and admittedly we are very busy in what we do. I knew having a baby would change my life forever but knew I could cope with it.

The best option was to abort

After several arguments later with my boyfriend we decided the best option was to abort. I booked the appointment with Marie Stopes for a medical abortion and that was that.

Gutted I tried to control my guilt and upset knowing that it was the right decision for us at this time in our lives.

Subsequently by boyfriend gave in and agreed to have our baby. I was over the moon, quite shocked really but chuffed to bits.

Two days later my boyfriend confirmed he had made a bad call and had changed his mind. He thought he could get used to the fact of a baby and had only agreed to make me happy. I knew it was killing him inside and I knew he couldn't of coped with it. So again I rang and booked another medical abortion appointment.

I went to the clinic where they scanned me to check how far into the pregnancy I was, 4 weeks. Then the nurse gave me the first tablet and made another appointment for the next day. The first tablet had no side effects and I didn't feel any different from it.

I went back the day after for the 2nd lot of tablets. There were 4 which I had to keep under my lip on the gums to dissolve for half an hour after which I could drink down with water.

Within an hour of taking these I could feel pains similar to period pains. Which would come and go in waves some stronger than others. I felt shivery and cold but no other symptoms. I was told to rest and place a hot-water bottle on my belly if needed. I took Ibuprofen just in case, even though the pain was bearable, I had read that the pain could be severe and really bad.

I kept moving as I had to work. Occasionally going to the toilet to see what was going on down there.

I passed the pregnancy in the form of clots

The bleeding remained heavy like period for the next 8 hours. The next day there was still some clotting but no pain at all.

All in all my experience of a medical abortion was simple and straight forward and would recommend anyone to go down this route if having one other than surgical abortion which is very invasive. I am content with my choice and looking forward to the future.

Marie Stopes clinics are outstanding and I thank them for their services.

This story was sent in on 05/11/2010 and it's been viewed 844 times.

Editor's comment

A second abortion can be very difficult particularly if you felt sure that you would never go through it again after the first one. Your decision was guided by your boyfriend's reactions, and that must have been hard to put your own longings aside because he couldn't cope with it.

I'm glad that the abortion clinic was helpful and supportive.

If you need to talk about your experience or would like post abortion support at any time please contact a centre for post-abortion support in your area.

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