I'm 9 weeks pregnant and will be 16 in 3 weeks time.

Well where do you start.. I'm 9 weeks pregnant and I'll be 16 when I'm 12 weeks and my boyfriend is in his first year at college. I have been a self harmer since 13 went to therapy, diagnosed with depression, but I lied for weeks that I was better and was discherged from therapy. I have been pregnant 3 times before, the first 2 I was far too young and lost them by choice the third I found out my state very late and soon after was devastated to find out I had a miscarriage during a week of mock exams and pressure.
My boyfriend doesn't want me to keep the baby, he believes he will be put on lists and won't get a job because I'm under age, he thinks it's the wrong thing to do , that it will mess me up... but I'm getting better, dealing with depression. I haven't had a full scale series in a long time and feel that this could be a chance I really need.
I have always wanted children. My sister has always wanted to work in the police, her heart is set on that job, I don't want a job, I want to stay at home and have children like my mum and nan and aunt... to watch my children grow. So to give that up now is heart breaking. I'll be due in October, so will be fine for my GCSEs in May-July. I can wait a couple of years and go to college 2 years late and then wait and then uni as a mature student. My parents are financially safe, they don't work, they buy /sell/ rent properties, so they could support me, if they chose to , but I've struggled with family relationships due to 3 years of depression. I believe if I abort like my boyfriend wants I'll slip back into a series, and it's not what I want... but I love him so much and have been with him a year, he means everything to me and I wish he could support me. I don't want to have a baby that isn't loved by one of it's parents... I'm so lost right now... and feel it's a choice of ruin his life and he hate me, or ruin my own and hate him and myself...

Editor's Comment

I can understand the dilemma that you feel you are facing. You are afraid of losing your boyfriend, or going against what he feels is best and right for you, but in your heart of hearts you long to continue the pregnancy. In terms of your boyfriends anxiety about being blacklisted for having an under age relationship, usually the only time this would apply is either if you were 13 or under, or if he was a lot older than you eg in his twenties. In relationships where you both consent and are of a similar age no action would normally be taken although technically it is illegal to have sex under 16.
I think it is important to make a decision that you are comfortable with and can live with longterm. You may resent your boyfriend if you choose abortion just because it is what he wants. It might help you both to sit down with someone independent and talk through your decision, so that you can both hear each others point of view.find a centre for pregnancy choices support in your area. Or you can call the national helpline and talk to an advisor 0300 4000 999.

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