Hello, I am 27 and I just found out I was pregnant 3 weeks ago...By anonymous on 29/06/2007
Hello, I am 27 and I just found out I was pregnant 3 weeks ago...I was in shock, because I was using pills (Cileste) at the time. The only reason I could think of is that I started to take them later than usual, so they probably didn't work for me immediately. Anyway, I always wanted a baby and I was thinking to keep it, but my boyfriend is 23 and he is definitely too young to be a father, even though he supports me and says he will accept any decision I will make he will be there for me. He is incredible. I can only see how much this young man cares for me and how amazing he is during this hard situation. But I made a decision to terminate the pregnancy and I feel a bit guilty, but this is not the right time and this is not good for my career as it is at its peak at the moment. I might sound a bit harsh...all I am scared of is not to have babies anymore, but I’ve read lots of things about terminating early pregnancy. There is a slight chance of risk...I hope I am not doing a mistake...I will keep you updated of my story after the termination...thank you.
Editor’s note: Thanks for writing in…you seem to have mixed feelings about a termination, revealing that you always wanted a baby but also saying that it’s not the right time because of your career right now. What you might be experiencing is the split between your head and your heart; with your head saying one thing and your heart saying something else. Attention must be paid to both parts – some women just suppress the heart message so that they can go through with an abortion but they feel pain, such as guilt, anger, loss and grief afterwards because they haven’t acknowledged the heart's message in the decision making process. I would also want to check with you if you really know what your boyfriend wants. You’ve only said that he is 23 and too young to be a father. Did he say that? Or is that your assumption? You might need to talk this through with a trained advisor together – both of you could visit your nearest centre. At least ring the helpline and check that you have all the information you need and have explored all your deeper feelings about your pregnancy and planned abortion. We'll be thinking of you at this time.