I had an abortion 3 years back and I still hate myself for it today.

I had an abortion 3 years back and I still hate myself for it today.
I was 17 years old and when my mother found out she immediately forced to have one. Part of me is angry at her for forcing me when she had her 1st child at 17 but she's my mother and I understand that she thought it was best.
I had a medical abortion. My boyfriend still wants a baby and so do I but its like it can't happen.

So now not only am I cheating on him but I also have unprotected sex with those guys in the hope that I might fall pregnant. To date I've had sex with almost 8 different guys and had a pregnancy scare with all of them. This is stupid and I'm stopping it but after losing a baby you can get really desperate!

Editor's Comment

What you describe is a reaction you can sometimes get after having an abortion you didn't really want. You can feel bad about yourself and what you are doing is devaluing yourself and treating yourself badly. It would be sad to fall pregnant in this sort of situation and I hope you will consider getting help so that you start to feel better about yourself. You can call the national helpline, log on to Online advisor, or follow the link to find a centre for post abortion support in your area.
This story was sent in on 05/08/2013

Other stories about abortion

I had a medical abortion privately yesterday.


An early medical abortion


Help & support is available

If you're struggling through a situation like that described above, or are being affected by similar issues from your past, no matter how long ago, help is available.

You can get free, sensitive & confidential help at a centre near you. Use these links for:

Got a story to tell?

Relating your story to other people can be very difficult but rewarding.

If you'd like to tell other readers, possibly facing the same problems you did, about your experiences please click the button to:

Tell your story →