I had a medical abortion three days ago and I'm not sure if it's gone to plan.
I found out just under two weeks ago that I was pregnant. I have always had irregular periods so had thought nothing of missing a couple however I had a migraine at work (which is normal for me) - ended up being sick, however the sickness didn't go away for days. I decided to do a test with my boyfriend and it came back positive, we didn't believe it. I did another test in the morning and it also came back positive.
I spent a couple days in shock/disbelief, going to work but being a robot. My feelings kept changing, I felt protective of the baby and felt hopeful for the future. I would then be unsure as I couldn't think of any options for the future with the baby. I have been with my partner for 6 years however we're still saving to move out and are living with his parents currently.
We went to the doctors together, I had to stop myself from crying however the nurse referred us to BPAS for a consultation. At this point I was still unsure. We left the doctors with a referral form and number. We pulled over and after hesitating for a while I finally called them - she asked if I wanted a consultation and treatment on the same day and I said no, just consultation.
We went to the Drs on a Friday and booked an appointment at BPAS for Tuesday. Over the weekend me and my boyfriend took time to discuss our options. After a lot of crying we decided that even though we love each other and eventually want children together, now is not the right time. After this the choice has been confirmed in my mind.. I DO want children (which I didn't think I wanted before this) however I want my own place, a sturdy job and income, a stable life for the baby.
On the Tuesday consultation I had various tests, temperature, blood pressure, blood type, BMI. I also had a quick talk with a Dr to advise why I wanted abortion and if I was definite. What did make me quite sad is that they wouldn't allow my boyfriend to be with me for any of this. I then had to have an internal ultrasound which was not pleasant at all.
As I had missed two periods from calculators I had done online I had predicted I was around 10/11 weeks which scared me. I shouldn't have but I had looked up foetal development which had upset me even though I knew I was making the right decision. However, the ultrasound found I was actually only 5 weeks 5 days.
I had originally set in my mind to have surgical (due to thinking I was further along) however due to being less I decided to have a medical abortion.
I was booked for the following day to have both treatments. I came in early in the morning and experienced poor service. We arrived at 8.15 for our 8.30 appointment. We had to have the first pill early as the second treatment has to happen 6 hours later and the clinic closed at 4. We sat in the waiting room for almost an hour, people kept walking past and looking in but nobody arrived. Eventually a nurse walked in then walked out without saying anything. She then returned and called us in.
During our 'appointment' with her she answered the phone several times, left the room twice and seemed very disorganised and unprofessional. I'm not one to make a fuss but my boyfriend was fuming - the appointment was getting later and later. Eventually she took my blood pressure and gave me the pill to take. She also had to give me an injection due to my blood type however hadn't got anything prepared so my boyfriend had to undo a plaster whilst she had a needle stuck in my arm. I was told if I was sick in 1 1/2 hours I had to come back as it wouldn't work. I was booked to come back 6 hours later for second treatment.
When we arrived for the second treatment she went over the medication. I was given antibiotics to take that night and for seven days, told to only wear pads etc. I was given 4 pills to insert. I was told I could take some ibuprofen or paracetamol as well if needed. We then left.
I was not prepared for the pain whatsoever. Within half an hour on our way home I was not in a good place, the pain was intense and I had flu like symptoms feeling very cold and shaky. We got home, my boyfriend gave me paracetamol whilst I laid in bed.
The pain intensified .. I've never been in so much pain. I couldn't stay still for more than 5 seconds, I was making noise in agony and trying not to scream. Rolling around in the bed trying to dull the pain even for a second. My stomach also felt upset but I didn't have any diarrhoea. I was still shaking and cold. I don't remember but my boyfriend says I told him I thought I was dying. At this point he called the BPAS helpline and they said they'd call back, they did .. half hour later.
Although I was in agony they wanted to speak with me, and I had to answer lots of questions. Eventually the conclusion was I should have been told about the severity of the pain and should have been prescribed codeine. The only option was for my boyfriend to rush out to an out of hours pharmacy and get me some over the counter co-codamol. The co-codamol made the pain bearable and I passed into sleep however woke every 4 hours in fear of the pain and took more medication. I passed no blood from 3.30pm when I took the pill until the next morning at around 8am when I went to the toilet. There was no 'plop' or feeling of anything coming out just blood and a bit of tissue. I only had a couple more bleeds in the toilet that day of similar type.
The next day I had strong pains on and off but not much blood, small parts of tissue. Today I woke up and had intense pain and lots of bleeding, more than any other day before. I've been topping up on painkillers. This afternoon I went to the loo and this time I felt something coming and heard a 'plop' - I didn't see it though as there was a lot of blood. I'm still getting pain waves on and off but not as much blood.
I'm worried things aren't going to plan and not sure if it's all gone. I've got to go back on Wednesday for another scan as in my original scan she couldn't see the sac? They never explained why I need another scan which I'm worried about. I'm regretting having a medical abortion, I wish I had had surgical as it seems quicker, less painful and less messy/traumatising.
Editor's CommentI am sorry that you had so little support and that this procedure was not fully explained to you. Usually the pregnancy passes within 4-6 hours and the pain will then subside. Your pain seems to have been very intense and much longer than the usual time. The second scan is normally to confirm that the abortion has been complete.
If you need some more support please log into Online advisor or call the national helpline. for post abortion support.