I wish my doctor had warned me the fetus would be a fully formed human

By anonymous on 24/04/2019
medical abortion abortion 19 weeks

I was 24 years of age when I found out I was 19 weeks pregnant. December 2018 I was going through a lot of depression and became sick. I suffered from seizures, high blood pressure, couldn't do anything for myself and lost so much weight at that time.

A friend who I met a month before, which was November, would come and check up on me from time to time, he never knew I had a boyfriend. He made me forget about the surroundings of life, then it happened that we had sex and used the withdrawal method. On the 2nd day, I bought the morning after pill [1] and drank it. So since I drank the morning after pill, I knew my periods would be delayed...

[Click for links to other stories about abortion organised by e.g. type of abortion and the weeks of pregnancy]

January passed and nothing came out but I wasn't too worried. Then February passed and still nothing. That's when everything started to hit me and I became worried...

I told the father of the baby that I thought I was pregnant but he never took me seriously and said to me that I'm not. But the fact that I wasn't getting my periods made me think too much about it.

I was very challenged when it comes to financial situations... In March it happened that I got an email from Qatar Airways inviting me for an interview. I was surprised because I never applied for their post that was recently advertised but my CV was registered on their website so I gave it a shot.

The whole process took the entire month because there are many stages to the interview. On the 1st April, everything was finalized and I got the job. This was a dream come true because after being rejected for 5 years it finally came and I was told by my fellow classmates who I attended aviation school with that I better hold this opportunity with my bare hands and never look back.

Second Week of April I felt something strangely moving and could hear something beating, I thought it was gas but then my lower belly started to become hard that's how I knew I'm pregnant because all along the process I never had morning sickness and I never shown that I was expecting.

I immediately borrowed money to make an abortion because even the father of the child wasn't caring enough to make means and meet me halfway at least even to buy a pregnancy test he didn't bother.

So I made an appointment with the doctor and he scheduled me on the 19th of April 2019...

In the morning I remember praying to God for the sin I'm about to do, I was kneeling down crying my soul out praying that may the procedure be safely done calling all my grandparents who are in heaven and so is my father to protect me from this as I was alone in it.

I told the doctor that I will be fine doing this at home to avoid all the cramps and pains on my way home... he gave me pills and instructions on how to take them and said I should text him or call during the process so he could stay with me and make sure that everything is fine...

I took the pills as instructed and the whole procedure happened after 5 hours...

I remember when I started to feel the cramps I had a bad bad toxic call with the father of the baby and everything began to go extremely high, my blood pressure was soo high, stress levels were high, anger was also high, even my heartbeat was high...

I started to scream and crawl to the toilet because I felt like I wanted to poop but that's when the abortion was happening... when I got into the toilet my water broke and felt like I had to push (to be honest I never expected to see what I saw).

I wish my doctor alerted me on how to avoid looking down because everything is just traumatic. The fetus came out fully formed as human then the placenta followed...

I cried, I watched my baby move a little, I held my baby with my hands though I don't regret having that abortion because it was the best for everyone.

At the moment I'm struggling to sleep because of what I saw... I don't wish for any woman to go through what I went through... But each day I'm taking it step by step, I pray to God for healing and forgiveness... And now I'm not worried to do medicals for my new Company (Qatar Airways) I will be working as a Flight Attendant and I'll be starting June 2019 with the training so I still have time to heal.

  1. Morning After Pill

    The "Morning After Pill", also sometimes referred to as "Emergency Pill", is commonly used to describe a form of emergency contraception. It's known under various brand names in different countries - e.g. Levonelle and ellaOne in the UK, or Plan B in the US and Canada.

    If you experience a contraceptive mishap or engage in unprotected sex, taking the morning-after pill as soon as possible (certainly within 72 hours and ideally within 12 hours - times vary according to brand/product) it may help prevent pregnancy. It does this by preventing the release of an egg from the ovary; preventing fertilization; preventing a fertilized egg from implanting into the lining of the womb (uterus).

    The morning-after pill is sometimes confused with the abortion pill but it's not the same thing i.e. taking the morning-after pill does not terminate a pregnancy.


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