I'm 64 now, but when I was 19 I found myself scared and afraid of what my parents would think

By anonymous on 05/12/2019
united kingdom abortion 19 weeks

Well, I started reading some of these abortion stories. Let me explain why it hits so hard and has never ever left my mind.

I do not talk about that day. I am 64 now, but when I was 19 I found myself scared, young and afraid of what my parents would think. I don't know and will never know why they couldn't have been more supportive of me. You see they were having their first child at 17 and 19. If anyone understood, you would think they would.

I just have to get all this out, because I have never, ever told anyone I had an abortion at 19 weeks pregnant. I was really thin at the time and no one suspected. My parents were the only ones that knew as well as my boyfriend and to this day he is my husband.

My mother went to the hospital that day with me. I can remember having a few cramps after they gave me something and then a while later I felt the fetus come out. When I attempted to look up, the nurse told me to lie back. I am assuming now that she did not want me to see the fetus.

I have never, ever got over this. I have two beautiful grown children and two grandchildren. I cannot even tell them what I did or went through. I remember that day in August 1975 as if it was yesterday.

I would just recommend everyone just think through your decision. I do believe in a woman's right to choose and only her. If for some reason you are feeling guilty, threatened, scared, or whatever, please talk to someone.

This is something you never, ever get over or at least I didn't. You do go on with your life and thank God every day that you have had beautiful children.

I know I will go on the rest of my life with this and without saying anything to anyone. My husband and I have only talked about it once over the years. Just thinking about all..

Editor's comment

Thank you for sharing your story. Please be aware that there's help available to those struggling with their feelings after an abortion, even after many years. Have a look for your nearest centre offering post-abortion support.

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