15 and pregnant.

15 and pregnant. When I found I out I was pregnant, I just collapsed inside, knowing that I messed up thinking what am I going to do? It turned out that when I actually knew that I was pregnant, because I stupidly didn't take a pregnancy test because it just came to me, missing my periods, fatigue and that one night, I went 17 weeks without really knowing that I was pregnant, until the day I felt it move. I wasn't thinking straight, or anything at the time just that I made a mistake with someone who didn't care about me. Just wishing I could take everything back, I just thought I can do it...

Being pregnant at 15, I just thought to myself, what am I going to tell my mom? How is she going to react? Will she hate me forever? So I thought... I can hide it from her. Because when she was 16 she hid it from her mother also until the day she gave birth to my big brother. And so I did, or the best I could, I was just trying to go on with my life at school and play it off, and I actually didn't have any common symptoms, just missing my period. And so For the first 8 months I did, my stomach wasn't really big at the time but other people started to notice I was big, my mom didn't detect anything so I though I was fine, but then one day my auntie asked my mom if I was pregnant, because I looked bigger to her.
One morning my mom came to me and asked if I was pregnant? I paused for a moment then looked at her and sadly said yes... She cried. 5 minutes later she asked me all the questions, by who? When? Why? Then She called the one of our counsellors/social worker and came out of what happened.
Once I told them my mom told me were not keeping it! I agreed. I didn't want it in the first place... So we got everything arranged and she came back to me hugging and telling me everything's going to be alright and I just cried and cried, because I was actually really scared.
A Day later she told me we have everything arranged to meet with a lady to arrange an adoption; one week later we go to meet her and she was the nicest lady ever, so we have everything worked out, when I'm going to pick the parents, where I'm going to deliver; only my mom, counsellor and the adoption lady know about it. So yesterday I chose the family my baby boy or girl will happily and safely go with, wasn't an easy decision but I know that it's for the best. And this all happened about two weeks ago! Tomorrow I go in for my second ultra sound, because right now I am 38 weeks and 5 days pregnant with a boy or a girl, apparently they can't find the gender cause I waited so long. So hopefully I will be delivering within a couple weeks.

Editor's Comment

This must have been a big shock for you and your family but you sound happy with the decision that you have made, and being confident that your baby is going to a happy home where it is wanted and cared for will give you confidence in your decision. Please contact CareConfidential if you need any support around this decision. Online advisor to find adoption support in your area.
This story was sent in on 06/08/2014

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