I got pregnant as soon as we tried.

I got married on November 2014, went on my two week honeymoon and we decided to try for our first time to have a baby. To my surprise I got pregnant as soon as we tried. I found one week after I return from my honeymoon . I remember clearly seeing three times positive pregnancy test, it was so pink! I was in heaven I had to stay quiet for two days since I wanted to let my husband know on his birthday. I did and we just hugged in the kitchen and were so happy and full of excitement. We decided to keep quiet but I eventually told my family. He kept his promise and didn't tell anyone.

The weeks passed and I couldn't believe my body was changing so much! my hunger was insane lol, my breast super sore, morning sickness horrible but I was happy taking my prenatal and even bought baby stuff . I went in at 5 wks and there was just a baby sac and they gave me the sad news that my progesterone levels were low but my beta and everything was normal. I even was taking vaginal suppositories since it would keep my progesterone levels normal. Went in at 6 weeks good news baby sac yolk sac and even fetal pole I was excited and very positive no more sadness and worry free.
4 days after I was laying down and felt a gush of liquid, ran to the bathroom and scream there in my panties bright red blood. I was scared and shocked and all the happy thoughts shattered to the floor, I was broken. My hubby tried to calm me down but no not me I knew something wasn't right. The next it was brown and less and less until it stopped.
Two days later again the red bleeding and then blood clots I knew that is it I'm for sure miscarrying. It was crazy we had a baby shower the next day what a torture for me seeing our friend celebrating her welcoming of her baby, while I was losing mine?? I got up to go the bathroom so many times and every time red blood and small clots. Finally we left couldn't wait to take a shower and there I got the worse pains ever in a fetal position in my shower crying my eyes out.
We rush to the ER where I couldn't even stand up I was having contractions and my blood clots were the size of a hand palm it was so scary! my back was killing me. They told me what I knew already, possible miscarriage but yet I still had a bit of hope. U/s confirm nothing in the uterus I had miscarried. The pains were my contractions expelling everything. I felt like someone just rip my heart out and just crush it into small pieces. I felt why me?!!! God I don't get it I'm healthy! I don't take drugs why!!!!!
The doctor said I will continue bleeding but no more blood clots he even squeezed my lower abdominal to make sure nothing else was coming out. He told me I can try but I decided I want to wait 4-6 months before trying again, it was just too traumatizing it really is. You feel empty, confused, angry, sad, and the thought of just trying soon it mentally takes a toll in a women. I hope anyone going through what I am that we are not alone and that it is very common so I just have to think positively. I was 8 wks pregnant when I lost the baby. I hope and wish every women reading this have a healthy pregnancy.

Editor's Comment

This is a very painful time for you, and I think you are right to give yourself some time to get over your loss before you start trying for another baby.find a centre for miscarriage support in your area.
This story was sent in on 26/01/2014

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