I'm a 34 year old single mum to two children and have just found out I am four weeks pregnant!!

By anonymous on 31/03/2009
I'm a 34 year old single mum to two children and have just found out I am four weeks pregnant!! I have been seeing the 'dad' on/off for the past five months and haven't told him yet. I know he will not want the baby as he doesn't want a serious relationship with me. I am in love with him though and, to be honest, would love to have the baby and share my life with him. But this is not going to happen, so I feel the best option for me is to have an abortion. I am struggling financially to bring up my children as it is, and have been a single parent for seven years now and really don't think I can cope being a single parent to three children. I feel absolutely torn and really not sure what to do.

Editor’s note: Thanks for sharing your story with us…Don’t assume you know what the father wants for this pregnancy. You may be right, but you may also need to give him the opportunity to decide for himself whether he will accept his fatherhood or not.

Having said that, you need to know for yourself what you feel about this pregnancy beyond the difficulties of your circumstances. You need to make your own decision based on accurate information about all the options open to you, having explored all your deeper feelings – your conscience, instinct and beliefs. It may make logical sense to end the pregnancy in our heads, but our hearts also have something to say about what’s involved here and it’s important to take that into account. That’s why you feel torn – there may be a deeper discomfort with the meaning of abortion. Talking it through with an advisor at your nearest centre may help you to make an informed decision, and give you space and time to think through these deeper issues honestly and sensitively. We’ll be thinking of you.

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