He tried to talk me into an abortion

By anonymous on 15/12/2010
I'm 24 years old and have a beautiful baby girl 4 months old.
I'm in a very tough situation though. I went on vacation to my hometown and met a guy downtown at a bar. He seemed nice, I gave him my number and he asked to meet up the next day. He kept asking me if I had a boyfriend and sweet talking.

We met up and stupid me had unprotected sex with him

It was a very short while, he looked guilty and stopped.
The following day he texted me saying he was married but I ignored it and told myself whatever I wasn't interested in him. It was the first time I did something like that having a one night stand. A few weeks later I found out I was pregnant. I called him and told him. He wanted me to abort and I told him it wasn't the baby's fault. He tried talking me into an abortion and I was considering it but my close cousin and aunts kept telling me abortion is not the answer. I followed there advice and continued the pregnancy. It was the hardest and most painful thing to do as I'm on my last year of college studying biology. I come from a conservative christian family, I had so much potential for myself and this had to happen.

I didn't know it was gonna be such a big responsibility once the baby came.

I sacrificed my reputation, my time, my body, everything and this liar doesn't have to sacrifice anything. He ended up changing his number and all I have of him is two pictures, his old cell number, and first name. I feel like I will never find him and let him know at least he has a daughter.
The another part of the story is that I had intercourse with someone else I've known for a while 5 days before, but with a condom and she seems to resemble him. This is very tough as I don't know if I should contact this guy, and do a paternity test. I'm scared of rejection and I told him I was pregnant as well but he said it can't be his since we used protection and he didn't want kids.
Sometimes I consider adoption but I love my daughter and my parents are in love with her, but they're not the ones having to raise her.

I feel like I can't take on this challenge everyday.

I'm sad and feel hopeless. My mother told me if I choose adoption she won't consider me her daughter. I really don't want to regret it in the long run too and feel like a terrible mother. I just pray and hope for better days, and just let go and let God take control

Editor's Comment

You made a very brave choice to continue your pregnancy knowing that you did not have support from the father. It is good that you have family support and although the first few years can be very hard work I do hope that you will still be able to continue your studies and have a career. It sounds as though you love your beautiful baby girl, and having that love for her will make you the best mother she could have. Try to hold on to the positives, and the pleasure your daughter will bring you as you watch her grow up.

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