Baby loss at 9 days old

After 6 years of trying for a baby our dreams came true in March 2009 when I gave birth to our son.
Everything seemed fine with him until 3 days after he was born he stopped breathing, we were still in hospital and the staff managed to resuscitate him.
Our precious baby was taken to the Special Care Baby Unit where he lived for a further 6 days, sadly passing away aged just 9 days.

Somehow I muddled my way through a year.

As the anniversaries of our sons birth and death approached I found myself in a bleak place, not knowing how to deal with things or how I was going to cope at this time.
I went to see my doctor for some help, although helpful enough she could not give me the support that I needed and put me in touch with Talking Therapies. I contacted them and had a telephone consultation, as I was not suicidal they could not offer me any immediate help, they could offer counselling with a minimum of 3 months wait and not with anyone that specialises in child bereavement. Talking Therapies suggested that I contact Reading Lifeline.
After the call I went online and got the details for the centre. I sent a brief email explaining my story and asking if they would be able to help, about an hour after sending the email I had a response from Lis at the Centre saying they would be happy to see me. In total I had 10 sessions with Lis, each lasting an hour.

I found these a great deal of help.

As well as helping me come to terms with what happened by talking through my feelings and emotions it also made me see that there were other things that were distressing me including relationship of family members who I thought should behave in a different way towards me. I have since realised that the only person they were effecting was me and I have since learned to live with the situation.
I am grateful for the services of the Lis and the centre. Talking to Lis has helped me to start to put the pieces back together in my life.

Editor's Comment

Thank you for sharing your heart breaking story of the loss of your baby son. It must have been a devastating experience and taken a lot of courage just to seek help. I am so glad that you managed to get the help and support you needed in the end. I know that you will always remember your son with sadness, but being able to work through some of your emotions and grieve for your loss helps to ease the pain.

This story was sent in on 10/01/2011

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