I have suffered four miscarriages.

I am happily married with a family, but along the way I have suffered four miscarriages. Each time it was different but all were totally devastating for me and my husband. I had two consecutively, then four living children, then two more miscarriages, so they refused to investigate why they happened because they only investigate if you lose 3 babies in a row.
My last child that died was a little boy and we had a respectful burial for him and also a service to remember the others that I had lost.
My dear little boy was so perfectly formed. He had fingers, toes, eyebrows, etc and every perfect detail; even at that stage he looked like his dad. He was 11 weeks and four days when I miscarried him. I was in total shock and disbelief at what was happening; but even though I was in floods of tears at losing him, I was in awe of what a perfectly formed little body he had. I saw him with my own eyes! I held him in my hand and gave him a kiss. I had another child after that who is now 11. I will always have a place in my heart for all my children including the four that I lost.
Most of my extended family still have no idea what happened because I didn't know how to tell them or if I could cope myself with telling them. Maybe I will one day when the time is right for me but I don't know when that will be.

Editor's Comment

It is always very distressing to have the loss of a miscarriage, and to have 4 miscarriages must have been extremely distressing for you and your husband.

This story was sent in on 23/01/2015

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