I had a little baby girl, but then she died just 2 hours later.
I lost two babies quite early on in the pregnancies,and another 2 later on in the pregnancies that I had to actually give birth to, so they were stillborn. Then I went full term with the last one and everything seemed to be going well. I'd told a couple of really close friends and they were really supportive but nobody else. I ended up having to go for an emergency scan due to a few minor complications and then a c-section. I had a little baby girl, but then she died just 2 hours later. It was such a hard time for me, and I have only been able to tell the couple of friends who knew I was pregnant ... I haven't even had any support from my local services.
The hardest part was having to hand over my baby's body to be cremated . I go to the hospital's rememberance garden regularly to leave some flowers or a teddy where her ashes are buried. Even after the very little time I had with her, I miss her so very very much. RIP Katie Louise 8/3/2009 13.27pm - 15.43pm ? xxxx
I am so sorry you have had so many losses, and to have a caesarian and then lose your little girl must have been heartbreaking. You obviously have some close friends, but you don't mention whether you have any family support. It sounds quite a lonely place to be and I am shocked that you have not had more help and support from local agencies.
If you would like to ring the National Helpline or write to Online advisor we would be able to give you some more support.You can find details on the website.