I was just 19 when I found out I was pregnant

By anonymous on 17/07/2010
I am currently 20 years old, but had just turned 19 years old when I found out I was pregnant.
The father was very unsupportive and very distant. He quite liked to manipulate and turn things around to be my fault. He very rarely talked about the pregnancy and acted as if I wasn't even pregnant. He quite bluntly said 'I don't want you to keep it' when I told him, and then he found it confusing when I was upset about this.

I chose to keep my baby

After many weeks of feeling unsupported and very down/alone/lonely/confused/unloved/frustrated/angry, I chose to keep my baby. This was not an easy decision for me to make, as (being young) doing 'young things' meant a lot to me ie - camping/pubs/socialising/studying/working part time etc, I had all the freedom in the world and that freedom was not easy to 'give up'.
Also, I knew in the back of my mind I'd be alone - well, without the father's support. All these thoughts were going through my mind, but my partner did not want to talk to me about them etc - it was always brushed off.
I told him I was keeping the baby, and he didn't even answer me back!! I had no contact for weeks and when it came to my 1st scan, I txt him and basically I got a txt back of abuse but quite apologetic also - trying to make me feel sorry for him - he wanted the control, but I took that away when I chose to make the right decision for me, not him!!
I had no contact from him through the whole of my pregnancy, but when I was heavily pregnant just a few weeks before I gave birth he got back in touch explaining how he'd like to be involved, but not with me because he had a new partner (the new partner he was with - well its quite obvious he was with her while he was with me).
My story is ongoing, but basically I made the decision for myself and it was the right one. I went with my gut instinct - but it was hard, because I had to give up everything!! But I done it!! And now, I have the most wonderful little 8 month old baby boy who I love to pieces!!

Editor's Comment

I'm so glad that you are happy and that you had the courage to do what you felt was right for you. From what you have written, it sounds as though your relationship would have broken up even if you had done what your boyfriend wanted. You have had to sacrifice your freedom for the time being, but you will still have the chance to enjoy yourself in the future. Well done!it must have taken courage to stand up for yourself, and I am glad you had help and support from a pregnancy centre. For pregnancy choices support please call the national helpline 0300 4000 999, or follow the link to find a centre for crisis pregnancy support in your area.

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