14 year old desperate to be pregnant again after abortion at 5 months

Hi I'm 14. And I had an abortion 3 months ago. I was 5 months pregnant and I feel guilt about it.
I kind of am wishing I were pregnant now and may be in fact as I've tried to conceive with different guys. I aborted the first time because it had a disability. My mom had been an addict and pregnant and had no money, and she made the appointment despite my saying I didn't want to. She said she'd kick me out so I did it and now I can't keep from thinking of the baby. I want to be pregnant but scared what'll happen if I were pressured again. I don't ever want it to happen again but all I think about is being a mom....

Editor's Comment

You are very young to have coped with a pregnancy, and then found out that the baby had a disability. I am not surprised that you found it hard to handle the pressure you were under. Following an abortion it is quite common to get longings for a baby, and want to replace what you have lost. I would encourage you to get some post abortion aftercare so that you can work through some of your emotions, and work out whether another pregnancy is the right option for you at the moment. You can call the national helpline 0300 4000 999, log on to Online advisor, or follow the link to find a centre for post abortion support in your area.

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