I'm 19 yrs old, 3 months pregnant

I'm 19 yrs old, 3 months pregnant..my parents don't know and my boyfriend wants to keep the baby! I just finished school and will be attending university in June..I do not want a baby as I know providing for it would be a struggle!!

I have 2 older sisters and they both have children..I will be the only child to go to university in my family!
My boyfriend,an only child, who does not work and has his mother spoiling him rotten, does not want me to abort the baby! I also feel like keeping it but I do not want to go through the same route my sisters did and make my child suffer! I look forward to going to university, studying, working and earning enough to help my family out! If my parents were to find out,they would be soo disappointed, they would probably lose all hope in me and all their trust will be lost!!

I've formed a bond somehow with this baby

I just can't let it suffer because as the mother, I'm suffering!! I can only have a child when I'm financialy stable, but my boyfriend keeps saying he will provide...excuse me for not believing him, I mean he does not even want a job..his mother does everything for him!!
I went to the clinic for my abortion..they told me the nurse had resigned and she was the only one left. Somehow I think its a sign that I should keep this baby as my pregnancy is becoming more advanced...but my circumstances at home don't allow me to have a child!! My parents are divorced and my mom (whom I live with) does not work! We and my nieces depend on the little maintenance money my father sends because both my sisters don't have well paying jobs!! PLEASE HELP ME TRY AND MAKE MY BOYFRIEND UNDERSTAND!! AND HELP ME BELIEVE THAT I'M DOING THE RIGHT THING!!

Editor's Comment

It sounds as though you are very torn in your decision. Your heart is wanting to keep the baby, and you feel you have bonded with it, but your head is telling you to have an abortion and wait until your situation is more stable.
You also worry about the support your boyfriend can realistically give you. Circumstances change all the time, so when you are thinking about your decision it is worth thinking about what could change like your boyfriend's employment. It is also worth exploring whether you could defer your university place for a while, or whether there are creche facilities that would still make it possible to continue your education and the pregnancy. Things don't always work out as we hoped or planned, but when you have a decision like this to make you need to weigh up what is the most important to you, and what you can live with without feeling regret.
No one can tell you what to do or make the decision for you. You have to be as sure as you can be that what you choose is right for you. If you would like more help, please login to Online advisor, a confidential site where you can get more help and support.

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