Having an abortion was the worst decision I've ever made.

Having an abortion was the worst decision I've ever made. I was 17 when I found out I was pregnant, I had the test done at a local clinic, straight away ppl were asking me what I wanted to do in regards to keeping the baby or aborting it. The shock of finding out I was pregnant was bad enough I didn't really have a clue what I wanted so I stuck with what I had always said I would do if I did ever become pregnant - an abortion. I started working with a counsellor who said she would sort out all my hospital appointments for me. However I wasn't allowed to have a medical abortion BY ONE DAY. I was so scared about having to go in hospital and have an operation. Then my counsellor went on long term sick, so I was left to sort everything out myself. I didnt know how to go about it and hadn't been told straight away what was going on with my counsellor, so it got left to the stage when I eventually had it done I was 11weeks and 4 days pregnant. 2 more days and I couldn't have had the surgical termination. The lad who had got me pregnant was someone I had been seeing for a while, and there had still been alot of feelings there. He agreed that an abortion was the right thing to do, but one night when he was drunk told me he didn't want me to do it because he loved me. However, by him forgetting every single appointment I had at hospital I doubted he really cared. What's happened showed me who my true friends are. 2 of my closest friends ignored me throughout, others where amazing. When it boils down to it I was too scared to tell my parents I was pregnant so did what I thought was the easiest thing. I was horrified when after my abortion I discovered how developed my baby had been. It doesn't seem right where me and the father really cared about each other yet I still went through with the abortion. I will never forgive myself, I think about it every single day. It was a month ago now and I think a lot of ppl expects me to have moved on. I don't think I ever can. Editor's Comment:- I am sorry you were let down by your counsellor and it sounded as though you were not able to really think through your decision properly, and be sure about how you felt.It is always important to have accurate information with a decision like this so that you can think it all through and make an informed choice. Please look at the web site and get in touch with some help and support.

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