An abortion booked for Saturday
By anonymous on 27/10/2011Fears of regret overwhelm my heart. I feel as though I am going through the motions of what is expected of me, as though I am looking from the outside watching a movie of someone else's life.
I feel as though no decision is mine, that the choices I am making are more to do with what I know is wanted, rather than well thought, discussed plans. I've somehow lost any clear way to rationalize this choice. I never imagined how powerless I would feel, how emotional this would make me, or how lost in the process I would become. Whether in my minds imagination or baked into reality, I feel something taking over my body. I feel my resources being stolen from me, used for the foreigner in my body's growth. This feeling is making this situation so real, it's bringing up thoughts and attachments that I never expected to have so early. As I sacrifice another day of not being able to get out of bed to sustain the life inside me, that same sacrifice is binding me to this being, it's forming a bond that I am so easily supposed to just terminate in 5 to 8 minues on Saturday.