It wasn't a nice thing to see and I always have flashbacks

I was on the pill, but decided I wanted to change it to a different one. I stopped taking it and had unprotected sex once and fell pregnant.

I did one pregnancy test that said negative, but I was not convinced. A week later I did another and it was positive.

I told my doctor that I wanted a termination as I was only 18 and due to start university in 3 months. I was referred to hospital for an abortion through NHS. I had to wait almost 2 weeks for the scan and by then I was 5 and a half weeks pregnant. I had to have a vaginal scan as the ultrasound couldn't pick up anything. I also did a swab for any infections and they took some blood.

I cried a lot and I was very scared about the medical abortion. My next appointment was to have the first pill. It was very easy I took it orally then went home.

The first day I was fine however the second day I began to pass big blood clots which really scared me.

The third day was my appointment to have the abortion.

I was in the hospital by 8am and had my own room with a tv. My mother and boyfriend came to support me. They were asked to leave the room and the nurse inserted 4 tablets into the vagina.

I was crying all the way through it as I was scared of what was happening

I had to use a bedpan every time I went to the toilet then the nurse would come and check if I'd passed anything.

I bled for a while and passed large blood clots but no signs of a foetus. 9 hours had passed and I had still not passed the foetus I was just bleeding very heavily. I was also having very bad pains and asked for pain relief.

The nurses then told me I could go home but first I needed an anti-d injection as I am rhesus negative blood type and it was to stop my blood mixing with the baby's. I stood outside the hospital waiting for my mother to drive the car to pick me up and all of a sudden felt blood gushing out of me, I felt like I wanted to close my legs to stop it but it was very intense. I got in the car and was very uncomfortable.

When I arrived home I went to the toilet and I saw the foetus

It wasn't a nice thing to see and I always have flashbacks. I bled heavily for about a week after and felt extremely emotional. I was relieved it was over and I still agree it was the best decision for me at the time. I have also had counselling and done “The Journey“ with a counsellor that has helped deal with my emotions.

It was a very dramatic experience for me that I would not like to go through again.

This story was sent in on 05/01/2012

Editor's comment

It is always likely that you may see what you pass during a medical abortion, and this can be very distressing and leave you with lasting images in your mind. I am glad that you have been able to do "The Journey" post-abortion support programme, and that it has helped you to process these difficult emotions. Hopefully it is a 'once in a lifetime' experience for you.

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