A Problem Shared is a Problem HalvedAbout four years ago, I fell pregnant, it wasn't planned and I decided my best option was to have an abortion. I arranged the whole thing on my own and told no one what I was going through or had planned to do. For me it would have made it real that it was actually happening and I was actually going through with this.
The day came to have the abortion and it only hit me when I had the scan to ensure I was over 7 weeks, I looked briefly at the scan but didn't really take it in. I came home and I felt relief, sadness but I knew it was for the best. I think the hardest thing for me afterwards was living with what I had done, the guilt, the bitterness , the anger. I don't feel guilty anymore or angry or bitter. My only regret is that I went through it on my own. I told a close friend a few years afterwards and she was shocked I'd gone through that on my own.
If your reading this and you have a decision to make don't do it on your own. A problem shared is always a problem halved.
Editor's CommentI think we sometimes use these defence mechanisms to cope with a crisis, and as you say not talking about it to anyone made it less real and almost as though it wasn't happening. I agree with you that it is better to talk it through with people you can trust, who will support you. I would also recommend talking to someone independent who can give you accurate information, and help you to think through the decision you are making.
This story was sent in on 12/02/2012