A medical abortion of a planned baby.By anonymous on 14/02/2012
I was in love with my partner and both couldn't wait for me to get pregnant. I've always dreamed of having a loving family just like mine and couldn't wait to create one since I thought I had found the right person to have it with. My first pregnancy ended in an early miscarriage, I was only over 4 weeks gone. I found it very difficult but it has brought me and my bf very close together. I felt I was pregnant again right from the start of the pregnancy. I bought hundreds of tests but they were all coming up negative. I was upset until I found out that my fiance was cheating on me with his ex and got her pregnant, she was already 3 months gone.
I got depressed but was very glad that my tests were negative. We tried to be together but there was just no way for me to forgive him I felt so insecure and not long after it turned out that my bf simply no longer was the guy I fell in love with.
And there it was I found a pregnancy test in my room, thought why not let's check again and two straight lines came up.I didn't know what to do I was upset, angry. There was a little angel inside of me, ,my relationship was in pieces and I didn't want to waste my life with a guy who just kept on letting me down. I thought, 'it doesn't matter I will keep it I'll be a good mum' but then having told my family about it, they made me see that I was just thinking about myself. They were right I would make it with the baby but what would the baby's life be without a proper family, how would I cope knowing that I could've done better.
After weeks of me crying all night long I decided to have an abortion. I went to clinic for about 8 times cuz was always ending up having a break out when the doctor asked if I was sure of my decision. 'NO I wasn't, I wanted this baby soo much, it was a blessing from God, a little angel but angels are supposed to be in good places'. And that's how it was, a mess in my head I didn't know what would hurt the baby more... Finally I have had a medical abortion. Went in on Saturday and got one tablet that was meant to stop my pregnancy hormones, then after 48 hrs I went in and had another lot of tablets, that asked me to wait for 30 min to see if the tablets melted in my mouth.
As soon as I walked out of the clinic I felt pain in my abdomen. My brother's gf was driving the car to take me home. I felt sick, I was vomiting, crying and shaking in the 20 min journey. As soon as I got in I ran to the bathroom, I could feel that I was bleeding, tried to take my jeans off but my legs were shaking and there was nothing I could do. I just sat on the bathroom floor, crying, I didn't know what to do.
I heard my mum begging me to open the door but I couldn't move. My dad somehow managed to open it they helped me to get up and take my jeans off. I ran to my bed I grabbed a towel to keep it inbetween my legs. The contractions became very constant and soon after I felt something huge coming out.