I had an early surgical abortion.
I hadn't missed a period when I first started feeling achy and sick. My breasts hurt just as they did with my last pregnancy, but the feeling sick and weak was a new, horrifying symptom. My husband and I seriously discussed the positive test, and we quickly came to the conclusion that for my health, our finances and strong feelings that our family was already complete, we needed to end the pregnancy.
I made an appointment that day for the next week. When performing the ultrasound, I was told it may be complicated because I had large fibroids... Something my GP never bothered to mention despite several appointments with her for female issues.
I was also told then that I was 7.5 weeks, which means that I never missed a period... And I fell pregnant three days or so before a period started.
I took the pills the doctor gave me to sedate me and lay in the office texting my husband. I only became concerned when I heard the patient in the next room screaming.
When it came my turn, it became obvious to me that the drugs hadn't really kicked in for me either... I wanted to get in and out quickly though, so I was mum about it.
I'm not going to lie, it was a painful 12 minutes... Painful like giving birth, but thankfully over a day shorter for me. I had to be scraped with a curette as well, because of the fibroids. I didn't scream or even stop texting.
There wasn't much blood or pain until two days afterwards when my body realized what I'd done. Then I was in for a good two weeks of terrible pain, which I'm told is normal at the end of a second pregnancy. The illness faded in about a day. The breast soreness faded in a week or so. I still have the weakness and the extra 10 pounds 4 weeks later, despite working out for two weeks in an attempt to build myself back up.
I don't regret our decision. I'm 31, we've barely just become financially solvent as a family, and my health isn't the best. I wish I had more support. I feel as if I can only tell my husband, and that I'd be especially stigmatized because I'm already an older mother living a life that's comfortable and few people understand how hard bringing another child into the family would be for us. I only wish women and our choices were respected more. for post abortion support.