I had one years ago...I was brought up pro-choice, and feel that way myself. Nonetheless it was a painful time.
By anonymous on 28/01/2008I had one years ago. We had been using condoms; I think it must have broken. I just read the college student's account of her abortion, and it touched a chord in me so I decided to write. I was brought up pro-choice, and feel that way myself. Nonetheless it was a painful time.
I don't know that men really understand it - at least, my partner did not. He would make jokes about how "My boys can swim!" like it was a good thing. He was proud, despite not wanting the baby. I was very upset at that time, I remember everything looked bleak. My last goldfish died around the same time, which probably sounds funny for an adult to be upset about, but it wasn't. : )
Anyway, I can't agree more with not looking at sites on the internet that are negative, and not listening to other people. The other day at work a lady was saying that if you have sex, you are accepting responsibility for a baby, and that abortion is wrong. I don't feel that way and I am happy to say I was able to brush off her comments. If she waited for marriage, bully for her. I WAS responsible. I used condoms and it was not the right time to have a baby for me.
People can be insensitive. When I called my doctor's office because I needed an official positive test, the secretary said I couldn’t expect the taxpayer to pay for my mistakes, which I had never even insinuated. She just came up with that out of the blue in a bitchy tone. At that time I let it sink me deeper but it feels good writing about it, screw you rude old secretary!
If people are against abortion, then don't have one, your opinion is uncalled for. I think people should keep that to themselves. I have a "friend" who also likes to occasionally go on rants against the procedure, well, screw him, too. I am tired of feeling sad and anxious and everything else.
Editor’s note: Thank you for sharing your story with us…You sound weary of feeling you have to stand up for the choice you made, and perhaps feel a little anxious about having to protect yourself from the insensitive and judgemental opinions of others, as well as feel understandably angry.
On another level, it sounds as if you have experienced a sadness that you may not have fully resolved over the years and which has possibly been covered over, even, perhaps, kept in a more manageable place, by some of these other, stronger, feelings. If that is the case, then perhaps it’s time for you to talk it through with someone who can help you come to terms with the possibility that, for some reason, your experience makes you sensitive to the opinions of others, but may also have caused you some sense of grief or loss as well. Whatever the case, you are welcome to get in touch.