I really don't want an abortion

I am 28 years old, a mother of a 4 year old & am currently 3 weeks pregnant. I left the father 2 weeks ago (not my existing child's father) due to his temper & he is also not the best with my child.
I found myself in the same situation a year ago (which I hate myself for). I decided to have an abortion, against the father's wishes, I just was not sure if I wanted him in our lives forever. I immediately felt overwhelming guilt & regret for my decision.
I am now in the same position. I am questioning if I seem to go this way towards our relationship when pregnant because of my hormones? I really don't want an abortion but am scared to put my 4 year old through a rough relationship.
I just don't know what to decide. I never thought I'd be in this position again.

Editor's Comment

I think that if you had a strong reaction to the abortion a year ago, it would be important for you to talk your decision through with someone rather than choosing abortion as a reaction to difficult circumstances. It may still be your decision, but living with guilt and regret is not easy, so knowing that you have explored your options and really thought through your decision will help you to be more at peace with whatever you choose. Follow the link for unplanned pregnancy support. or call the helpline 0300 4000 999.

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