He would have nothing to do with me if I kept the baby.

By Pamela

I fell pregnant at 17 around 6 months ago to a guy I thought I loved. As soon as I told him, his words were "If you keep it, I will have nothing to do with you or the baby and you will be blocked off everything simple". Obviously my head was muddled and I didn't want to lose him so I agreed with him to keep him happy. He told me we would start fresh after it was all over with so I kept thinking about that.

I didn't have my parents there to support me so his parents came with me to the scan and also when I went in for the abortion. I had to get it surgically removed as I was 13 weeks. It was such a horrible feeling but he and his parents were being so supportive.

After the operation and about a week later he started to ignore me and make excuses not to see me. He then later told me in an argument that he said everything he did to keep me "sweet" and that he didn't care about me or the unborn baby. He knew well that it was the hardest thing I had ever gone through and even six months later it still doesn't go away. I've been admitted with depression and now going to see a counsellor as the thoughts are getting worse. I don't know if it was a regret that I did it for him or if I'm just struggling but I've never felt so down in my life.

Editor's Comment

It always feels cruel and very manipulative that a guy would persuade you to abort to save your relationship, when he has no intention of staying. Unfortunately it is quite a common scenario, and has clearly left you feeling betrayed and abandoned. I think that post abortion counselling would help you to process some of these very painful emotions.

Pamela sent this story in on 20/07/2015

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