I couldn't believe I found myself in this position for the SECOND time in less than 6 months

Being someone who personally never believed in abortion, I couldn't believe I found myself in this position for the SECOND time in less than 6 months.

Just in February I had discovered I was pregnant and I received a medical abortion in March. It went very smoothly and I began taking birth control. There's no excuse, the birth control did not fail, there was no accident, this time, it was all our fault.

I'm still with the man I was pregnant by the first time. However this time, we were careless and just decided that if I did end up pregnant, we would deal with it. But when it did actually happen, he was the only one that was still ready to have it.

My boyfriend is significantly older than I am and he's ready to have kids but I want a career and most importantly a HUSBAND before I have kids. It's very important to me to bring my child into a stable environment and a happy home. So I made the decision that keeping it would not be the best option.

I set up my appointment at Planned Parenthood. Having already done this, I felt a little less nervous than the last time. The staff treated me with care and no prejudice. The doctor still went over everything again despite my previous experience and this time they gave me way better medicine.

I thought I was about 7 weeks when I went in but I ended up being 8 weeks and 5 days. I ALMOST missed the 9 week mark and to be honest if I had, I wouldn't have gone through with it. I refuse to do the surgical abortion just because of my own fears and from experience I feel more comfortable doing something like this at home.

I went in on Tuesday afternoon to get my Mifeprex. After all the tests and ultrasound was completed, I was given the Mifeprex, birth control and a prescription for pain and nausea medications. TWO things I did not receive the last time. I took the pill and was on my way.

I experienced no cramping or bleeding. The next day exactly 24 hours after, I took both prescriptions as instructed 30 minutes before the next step. After 30 minutes, I inserted the 4 misoprostol tablets between my gums and cheeks and let them dissolve for an hour. I then laid down with a hot blanket and let the medicine do the work.

About an hour and a half passed before I felt any changes. My period cramps are typically unbearable so these pains were somewhat tolerable, but I know for someone else, they might be considered excruciating.

The pain meds were making me sleepy but then I just felt the urge to pee. I got to the bathroom and began to vomit but that only last for a few seconds. (Less than last time) and I had no diarrhea unlike last time. I slipped into the shower and felt a burst and saw the blood run down my leg. I felt a sense of relief knowing the worst was beginning.

I spent the next hour pushing and sitting as the hot shower ran. I literally saw the baby and the sac when I passed them so once that was over I was ready to get out.

The cramps were still bad so I took another pain pill since it had been exactly 4 hours since the last dose and I laid back down with my heating pad.

I had such terrible nausea before, I was so excited to eat. I ate slowly and still drank a lot of fluids and the pain subsided.

I am anaemic and although the pill is not recommended for us, I still did it but I monitored my bleeding very closely. I was not bleeding excessively at all so I felt comfortable with the procedure. Eventually, I drifted into sleep and when I woke up I felt brand new.

Today is the day after and I feel good overall. I'm still cramping a bit but it comes in waves and the bleeding is normal like that of a period on the first day. For me the most difficult part was emotional. I have a very high pain tolerance but emotionally, this is never easy and I never want to go through it again so my next baby will be with my husband.

It's very hard to move on and forgive yourself. But I know I did it for the right reasons. There are just a lot of horror stories out there about these abortions and I wanted to maybe give someone a peace of mind so that they can make the best decision regardless of fear, etc. be strong and don't do it unless you're sure you want to. Once you start there is NO going back.

This story was sent in on 14/08/2015

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