I'm 33 and this is the first time I have become pregnant and it's a shock.

By anonymous on 25/06/2008
I never expected to be in the position of having to make this decision. I'm 33 and this is the first time I have become pregnant and it's a shock. Although I'm in a stable and loving relationship both my partner and I have always felt we wouldn't want to have kids and did our best to ensure it didn't happen.

The trouble is that now it's happened I’m not so certain any more. I never expected all these emotions and to feel in some way quite happy to be pregnant. However we are not in a great financial position as I’m out of work and my partner is on a low wage. He feels that now is not the right time for us and I know that practically he's got a point, but I don't know how I will cope with the prospect that I had an abortion because it wasn’t the right time. I don't know if that's enough of a justification to me for doing it.

Editor’s note: Thank you for sharing your situation with us…It seems that you are in a place where your head is telling you one thing, the logical, sensible thing to do given your circumstances, but your heart is giving you another, deeper message, one that says ‘I’m happy to be pregnant’ and ‘I’m not sure I will cope with my feelings if I have an abortion for that reason’. Your instinct is surfacing - perhaps for the first time - with regard to pregnancy and motherhood.

It’s important that you listen to your heart and not just your head, because if you ignore the heart’s message, you are at risk of emotional pain after an abortion. It’s very important that you talk this through with someone skilled in helping you listen to all the parts of yourself, enabling you to make an informed decision and not one based simply on the fear of how little money is in the bank. Contact your nearest centre, ring the helpline or use Online Advisor for the support you need right now.

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