I’m married, but have never had sex with my husband, so I knew this baby wasn't his.
I’m married, but have never had sex with my husband, so I knew this baby wasn't his. I work in a small office where everyone knows, or thinks they should know, your business. In short, I was going to do this alone, in secret and without having any time off work. Can you feel the fear?? So after the home test result I was in bits. I phoned the doctor and explained a little of the situation and made an appointment for the next day. Luckily, I had researched everything. (I had one previous surgical abortion over 10 years ago so knew this wasn't going to be an option) and was hopeful that the 'abortion pill' would be the best for me (even though a smoker, and over 35). My doctor had made all the arrangements with the hospital as far as she could, then we went through the other details together. I then had to wait a week before phoning for my hospital appointment which came a week later.
My first hospital appointment on the Monday at 9am lasted one and a half - 2 hours. I had a scan and a chlamydia test. We discussed my options and as I was only 6 weeks 6 days I could have the early release abortion, meaning I could do it in my own home, fantastic!! Usually you get one tablet and then come back in 24 hours for your second, but because of work I wasn't able to come back in until the Wednesday morning, which the nurse and doctor checked and both said was fine. So first tablet taken, then back to work for 10.45. Over the next couple of hours I felt a little crampy, certainly nowhere near as crampy as pre-period, but even then I hardly get any pain. Really this was more like a dull ache. The nurse did say that occasionally you would 'expel the products of conception' after your first tablet but more than likely after the second lot of pessary tablets.
Sorry in advance, this may make you squirm... Luckily, or maybe unluckily, I think I expelled it on the Tuesday afternoon. Again, I was at work. Again I felt a little crampy. Then I needed the toilet. So I walked the twenty paces to the toilet, sat down and (sorry!) WHOOSH! I heard a loud plop. Not just a blood-escaping-plop but as if I'd dropped a tampax down the toilet. As I'd shed a lot of blood (and not gallons, folks, just a normal period amount), I couldn't see what I'd passed, and I wanted to. I used a stick to move the water about and what I felt was jelly-like but quite large. maybe two inches. I didn't need a proper look. After that I bled more profusely, but again, like a heavy clotty period.
Wednesday morning, second appointment. I explained what happened to my nurse and she thought that I probably had expelled everything. I took the four pessary tablets, and got the choice to insert them myself - woo hoo!?- then lied that someone was outside waiting for me. I walked myself out, and got myself into a taxi and came home to my empty house. The cramping got a little worse, the blood got a little heavier. That was all. One week later and back to the hospital for my check-up scan. All clear. All over, with no-one knowing.
I don't mean to sound unfeeling, but to me the people with the worst experiences are the ones that want a baby/don't want an abortion. It is what it is. Take more time to think of what you, and it, need and want. I have known from an early age that I don't want children. The physical act of expelling a baby doesn't affect me...the stupidity of getting pregnant in the first place does. It won't happen again. I wrote this as I am acutely aware that people are more likely to post bad experiences than good ones. It was no worse than a period. Good Luck and best wishes to anyone that has to do this.