I am against abortions, I would never have thought of taking another life, whether it was just a bag of blood or not.
I am 15 and in my last year at school so I felt I couldn’t have a baby at the moment. I didn’t want to have an abortion but when I sat down and thought of all the stuff and the potential I had it seemed like the better option. One week left until the abortion, I am 6weeks pregnant, the Dad had made it clear he would not be there for me if I continued with the pregnancy so I thought it would be the best for everyone. I’m counting down the days till the abortion, I’m having a surgical abortion. I thought it would be better to get it over and done with than coming back for three days knowing its slowly dying inside of me. I have never been so scared in my life. I’m scared I will regret this in the future, I’m scared of years to come, and I will be wondering what if? and how old? and would it be a girl or boy? what would be its first words? what would it look like? would it look more like me or the father? this is the last thing I want, even if I was a couple years older this would not be my decision but it seems I have no other choices left. I don’t know how I got myself in this predicament in the first place. I was stupid, and behaved like an immature child, not some one who’s getting straight A's in school and is ready to take on life. No one believed it when I told them the news, they thought I was joking, So that’s why I have no choice but to have an abortion, I don’t want to, I keep reading that its got a heartbeat and so on. My parents love to keep telling me its just a bag of blood at the moment but since I made the decision to having an abortion, I can’t eat, sleep, or study as hard as I usually can I got too many things on my mind, I just hope other teenagers especially girls out there know the consequences of unsafe sex, always use a condom! and if not then go on the pill, implant, injection, something! Just never get into the mistake I did, I would not wish this on my worse enemy, having to choose, whether to bring something into this world at such a young age and end your dreams of becoming anything, or get rid of it and carry on living like nothing happened. I am ashamed of what I have done but not of writing my name, I hope I can be an inspiration and a guide to young pregnant girls like myself, those of you who think you are ready, you are not! He is not going to stay with you, and he is not going to be there for you, you will end up being a single mum really young, tied down, unable to do the stuff everyone else is doing, for example if I kept the baby, I would be heavily 9 months pregnant by the date of my prom! or if not got a newborn baby to look after that night, I would more or less be single for the rest of my life, no man wants to take on a woman with baggage, it would be hard, so in the long run I know I’m making the right decisions it just hurts me when I think about it so I try not to. It will be better when I’ve got a husband and have settled down, and am emotionally ready to have a child, and to start a family. I don’t think it would be fair on the baby if I kept it right now as well. So for all young girls like me out there, please think before you do things, condoms are invented for a reason!
You are in a very difficult position because you feel too young to have a baby, and you feel that it would ruin your life at the moment. On the other hand abortion seems to go against your instincts and what you feel is right. It seems as though there is a battle going on between what your head is telling you to do and what your heart feels is right. I do think it would help you to talk this dilemma through whatever your decision. Sometimes it is better to be sure about what you are doing rather than forced into a corner that feels very uncomfortable.
Please call our national helpline if you would like to talk to someone. The number is 0300 4000 999