A 14 year old who chose adoption
By anonymous on 13/10/2010It was April 2009 when I found out I was having a baby. I remember exactly what happened the day I found out, I was with my best friend and we were out in town and I picked up a pregnancy test. She looked at me and said "No, really?!" and I just looked away.
We went back to my house and at first I didn't want to take it but without my friend's support I don't think I would of so I took the pregnancy test, waited which seemed a life time and there it was. Pregnant.
My first reaction was to cryI cried and cried which seemed for hours but the whole time my friend was there telling me it would be alright.
About a week after finding out and thinking about myself and what to do, I had to tell the father.
We were never together but I knew I loved him. I had known him for 3 years and we were always together. So the day came and I went to his house, knocked on the door and his mum answered. She said " hello nice to see you, haven't seen you in a while, he's upstairs in his room go on up" so I walked up the stairs and knocked on his door and walked in.
He was sat there watching TV but as soon as he saw me he jumped up and gave me a hug. I told him he needed to sit down because I had something to tell him so he sat down and I did too, and all I said was "I'm pregnant."
He sat there for about 5 minutes and didn't say a word at all, and eventually all he said was, "I love you, but we can't keep this baby." After seeing him I didn't really know what to do, he told me he loved me so I thought why couldn't we keep the baby, but now I know I was naive.
I didn't understand the full responsibilities of a babyBeing at the same school as my boyfriend and friend, it was hard because he told some of his friends and then the whole school found out. People were saying things to me which I never thought anyone would of said but he was always sticking up for me until someone made up a rumor about me that I wasn't even pregnant which resulted in him Shouting at me in front of our whole year group, saying I'm a liar and other various things.
I left my school after that, and didn't see him.
A few months past and it was October 2009. I knew I was having a little boy and I was so happy, my mum was very supportive as was most of my family, and it was also my 15th birthday in October. I was just going to have a meal, so we went out for a meal on my birthday to an Italian restaurant and guess who was there, my boyfriend. He saw me and how big I was, and came up and said sorry for embarrassing me and saying I was liar. I accepted his apology.
We decided on an open adoptionAs the weeks went by my boyfriend persuaded me to put our son up for adoption, and my mum said she agreed with that more than me keep him myself.
So we found a couple who couldn't have children who were in their early 30's and had respectable jobs and a lovely home where our son could be brought up. we decided on an open adoption. December our son was born 5lbs 6oz at 6:10PM.
Throughout the birth my boyfriend was by my side the whole time. I was in labour for 22Hours, but it was worth every minute and the first time I got to hold him was magical I cried so much. I knew he was going to his adoptive parents but I didn't mind because they could give him so much more.
We were in hospital for about 3 days and then we got discharged and my baby went to his new home, and I went home.
Now we visit him every 2 Months, and have lots of photos of him and we made a scrap book about us, so he knows his birth parents.
I'm glad I made the choice I did because I'm so happy he has a great life. Me and my boyfriend are together and happy and more strong than ever.
Editor's CommentThank you for sharing your story. It was a very brave decision and very unselfish of you to choose adoption for your baby. I'm glad that you are able to keep in touch with him, and see that he is growing and happy.
You are now able to carry on with your education and decide what you want for your life. I hope you will be able to keep in touch with your adoptive family. You have made quite a sacrifice for your baby and given them the chance to be parents.