I am 33 and 9 weeks pregnant

By anonymous on 03/03/2011

I don't know if I love him

I am not sure what to do. I am 9 weeks pregnant. I got pregnant when my boyfriend and I had been seeing each other for only a month. I am 33 and have been wanting a child, although I had always hoped to find the "right" man to have it with. I don't know if I really love my boyfriend. I still want a child but think maybe this is the wrong time as I am having trouble deciding how to deal with it. Abortion or keep it?

I wonder if I would regret an abortion

I feel like if I have the baby I should stay with my boyfriend even if I don't love him. He is very supportive and loves me very much but I am not sure my feelings for him. It would break his heart if I split with him and had his baby. It is hard to split with him when I am pregnant and want a loving partner. I just cannot make myself love him. I am very conflicted as I don't want to give up the opportunity to have a child but I don't like the situation, and I wonder if I would regret an abortion.

Editor's Comments

There are 2 separate issues here : your baby and your relationship. Obviously both are very important, and you need support in processing them at this time. Please allow yourself to explore the options you have, and to talk to your boyfriend about how he sees the future with all it's different outcomes. Giving yourselves time to develop the relationship is important. This can be hard when you have a baby but it's not impossible, and will allow you both to work out what's right. You have a strong desire to continue your pregnancy. Going against this will leave you vulnerable to regret and guilt. Hopefully your boyfriend will understand your need to take the relationship slowly. For support during this time, please follow the link to find a centre for crisis pregnancy support in your area.

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