A second pregnancy after an abortion in February.

Hello I feel ashamed even as I write this, because I had an abortion at the beginning of this year in February.
Now I have found myself pregnant again! I am in exactly the same position as I was when I decided to have an abortion last time. My partner has told me he wouldn't support me with this child unless I stay in relationship with him, but I've only been with him 3 months and it hasn't been going well!
I already have 1 child who I find it difficult to provide for, and I am scared I can't cope alone with 2 children.
When I had the last termination I found it very very upsetting and felt guilty and depressed, but did eventually realise it was the best decision for my child and myself.
Now I've got myself pregnant again and I'm totally devastated because I swore I'd never do that again but I'm too scared to go ahead with this pregnancy! after the last termination I think on a subconscious level I was wanting to get pregnant again now I am I can't cope.

Editor's Comment

The feelings you are describing can happen after an abortion. Although you felt it was the right decision for you and your child, it may still have been very distressing and given you feelings of guilt and grief. There is often a deep longing to replace what you have lost, and an anxiety that you may not be able to get pregnant again. These feelings often come from your heart, although your head would tell you that your situation has not changed, and pregnancy is still going to be difficult. Whatever your decision, this is going to be hard for you. Another abortion on top of unresolved emotions could lead to serious mental problems for you. Continuing the pregnancy will be hard work, but as you already have one child you know what this commitment would be like. In practice if you decided not to stay with your partner, he would still have to support you financially, and the child support agency would ensure this. If you would like to talk your decision through please contact CareConfidential.find a centre for pregnancy choices support in your area.

This story was sent in on 25/11/2011

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