A casual relationship that became abusive

I was in a casual relationship while on a break from a 9 year relationship with a love that is hard to find.. The casual relationship was only 3 months, very abusive to the point I have a restraining order and pending assault and battery charges.
I'm 14 weeks pregnant with a bi-racial baby and terrified. I spend most of the time crying, wanting my old life back thinking of how bazaar this all is but part of me also wants the baby so I feel I could have regrets.
I am running out of time to make a decision, afraid of the lifestyle choice, afraid of the father and afraid to lose the love of my life. I can't figure out what the right decision is and if I will ever be happy again.

Editor's Comment

It sounds as though you have got yourself into a situation that is a long way from the casual relationship you had anticipated. You need help and support to extracate yourself from this without regreting the consequences. find a centre for crisis pregnancy support in your area. or call the national helpline or Online counsellor for help.