I have found out that I am 11 weeks pregnant and my partner is no longer in love with me.
Editor’s note: Thanks for sharing your story with us…It seems you are really in this place of an agonising decision because you no longer have the support of your partner, not because you don’t want this pregnancy.
You say twice that a decision for abortion would be hard, firstly because you have had three miscarriages and secondly, because you have seen the baby’s heart beat. It’s clear what your heart’s message is. Circumstances can always change, but it’s very hard to change the heart’s pain following an abortion. An abortion may also be hard because you have previously suffered depression, even though it was post-natal depression.
I notice how you write ‘my partner is no longer in love with me’. For some, this may mean that the feelings for the other person have worn off – the nice, positive, warm feelings that we get from being in a relationship. Perhaps these feelings should not decide how long a relationship lasts. Perhaps the decision to commit as a partner and as a father should determine the course of a relationship instead. It’s a challenge.
But right now, you need support to face this pregnancy with courage, develop your support network and find ways of coping well. You need not be alone. A trained advisor from your nearest centre can talk this through with you and support you for as long as necessary. Contact your nearest centre, ring the helpline or use Online Advisor. We'll be thinking of you.