After an abortion at 18 I am not going through this again.

I found out I was expecting my second child when I was four weeks pregnant.
My situation, can be heard along any street in any city, and so I felt I need to share it with someone else who may be struggling with their decision.

I had an abortion when I was 18 years old.

I thought it was the best thing for me at that age. I was too care free to worry about a child, and plus I just started college so how was I going to raise a child and go to school at the same time?
Anyway, the abortion changed my life. Almost two years after I aborted my first child, I became pregnant with my daughter. However, since I hadn't emotionally dealt with the abortion I ran to alcohol to mask the emotions that were consuming my thoughts.
I left my daughter with my mother, finished college, and thought I was doing the right thing. All while drinking excessive amounts of the partial numbing poison. Last year, I checked into rehab, and have been sober for almost 1 year. I am a better mother, daughter, and friend. However, my life is still interesting.

I am keeping this child

I found out I was pregnant with my second child (3rd pregnancy), about 3 weeks ago. I was on birth control, an IUD, and although I was being careful, this baby had other plans.
The father of this child informed me that I am to get an abortion, regardless of the pain that it put me through in the past, and if I didn't he wouldn't be involved.
However, I am keeping this child. I am not a weak person! I am strong. I am beautiful, and my intentions are to raise children who have this mentality about themselves.
You have to do things that you believe are morally right for you. No one has to live with this decision more than me, and although an abortion could make things easier, it makes things harder when you start to question your morals and ethics.
Do what is right for you, but not because someone told you to. Women, we are strong, we are beautiful, but no one will believe it until we start believing it ourselves.

Editor's Comment

you are writing from a different standpoint having experienced abortion and now know how you reacted to it and what is the right decision for you. It is sad that we sometimes have to go through experiences before we really know ourselves. On the positive side 'in every mistake there is a lesson waiting to jump out'and no one can say that they have never done something that in retrospect was wrong for them. If it helps us to know ourselves better than we can come through stronger and more sure of ourselves. Thank you for sharing your journey. I hope you enjoy your family.

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