My wife does not want the baby
Then a week ago we discovered the pregnancy
This has become very quickly the hardest thing to overcome, and puts the other issues into perspective very quickly. My wife does not want the baby and wants to focus on her career, feels we are already at full capacity and is still not sure about the strength of our relationship. I agree with some of these concerns. She has booked in for self referral and is going to take the abortion pill in the next few days. I have said I will support her decision, however I am not on the same path and would dearly love to keep the child. I am a third child and my wife was brought up singly. I am not saying that has anything to do with the decision making but makes it more difficult for me. I am not sure what the future will hold and if we can work through this and the other issues, but feel totally at a loss and powerless.Editor's Comment
Thanks for having the courage to describe your unplanned pregnancy from a man's perspective. You have been through a difficult time finding out that your wife had become emotionally attached to her boss. This must feel like an enormous issue to try and deal with in the midst of the turmoil.I am concerned that if you don't tell your wife how you are feeling about the abortion you may feel resentful and find that this drives a wedge between you. Voicing your feelings does not mean you are being unsupportive or pressurising. You can say that you would love to keep the child and realise that this would be a big sacrifice for your wife. If she chooses to continue with the abortion you will give her your complete support, but that it would not be your choice. It is only fair that she knows your feelings and that there is a transparency between you, if you are going to give your relationship the best chance.
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This story was sent in on 12/03/2012
