I'm 17, yes only 17 years old and I was pregnant.
I used contraception so didn't have a second thought about pregnancy until I was about a month and a half late. I took two pregnancy tests over a week which both came up negative but I'm quite irregular and am stressed at college at the moment so thought that was the reason. Then I was 2 months late and knew there was another reason, I was 90% sure I was pregnant.
I didn't know what to do, I was only thinking of adoption or abortion, I didn't want to abort a child but I had drunk a lot of alcohol before realising I was pregnant and still struggle with anorexia and depression so felt my body getting bigger and having to give away my child would be hard for me to handle. I couldn't raise it on my own either, I can't financially support a child as well as myself.
Then, on my sister's birthday, at the most, 9 weeks pregnant, I didn't need to make a choice, I started my miscarriage. At first I thought the pain was morning sickness which then grew stronger and then I began bleeding. No one knows and no one will ever know, not even the father.
The only thing I really need to be able to say without whispering through my tears to an empty room is goodbye my wonderfully beautiful, darling child. I'm sorry I failed you, I promise I will try to be a better person to make you proud. I love you, words cannot describe how much I love and miss you without even holding or meeting you. Forever and always, you'll be in my heart.