An abortion 11 yrs ago caused depression + low self-esteem resulting in the break-up of my family

I was 36 when I had an abortion eleven years ago. My husband had had a vasectomy as we had three children and could not afford any more.

I was in the middle of a teaching degree when I found I was pregnant. My husband had refused to take his sperm sample back for the all clear!

I had always wanted another child and did not want an abortion, but my husband did. He didn’t pressure me and said the decision was mine but I knew having a baby would cause immense strain on our marriage, not to mention financial hardship.

I went ahead with the abortion and it is a decision I have regretted every day since.

I wish I had had the courage to do what my heart knew was right rather than what my head was telling me was practical. I feel I was weak and spineless for not standing up for what I wanted.

The pain, anger and guilt have led to me suffering from psychological trauma, depression and low self-esteem, and have resulted in my husband and I separating and the break-up of our family.

I understand that not everyone suffers as I have and would argue for every woman’s right to choose. However, I think there is a very definite need for all women to have access to thorough counselling and support.

I don't feel that I had that and I am at present considering going for counselling to help me achieve some peace of mind.