I was on birth control before I was pregnant but didn't know how the pills worked

I was 12 at the time... I didn't have very good parents. My dad was an alcoholic that was gone all the time and my mom was on drugs & looking for any man to give her attention...

My boyfriend was 18. I was so scared. I didn't want him to get in trouble. My mom was in jail, I had just moved in with my grandmother. Me and my boyfriend would hide anywhere to have sex...

I remember being put on birth control a couple months before finding out I was pregnant. I was young & naive. I didn't know how the pills worked & I never took them right. I had a gynotologist appointment &  my period was late. I noticed it but my period was late sometimes so it really didn't raise any flags.

I remember the day of my appointment, it was during spring break (I was out of school) and was just an ordinary day.

My grandma took me to my appointment, I peed in a cup for them and they even drew blood... I had no clue.

We had already seen the doctor & we were checking out when the doctor came back out and told us we needed to go back to the room. She looked at both of us and I just remember her telling us i was pregnant and she said it may be a faulty test and she'd check my blood and call us when she knew...

I cried the whole way home! I was terrified! My grandma wasn't mad and she told me she'd take me to get the abortion if I wanted to. I wasn't but 5 weeks. All I could think was I'm not ready for a kid.

When we got home my grandma went to the store and bought a home pregnancy test. I took both of them. Sure enough, they both came back positive. I just wanted to have the abortion and move on with my life, I cried all the time.

I made the appointment for the abortion like a week later and my grandma took me. I had a pill abortion so I just took a couple big white pills every day for about a week and it basically just made me have a miscarriage. Of course, they gave me pain pills for the cramps.

I had a follow-up appointment and everything went well. I got a good birth control and took it every day at the same time for 3 years. I am now 15 & I'm ttc.

Me and my boyfriend then have been broken up for a year and I and my current boyfriend/fiancé now are trying for a baby. I really wish I kept my baby then, but I understand why I made the choice that I made.

I really feel a lot of guilt about it and I've had 2 miscarriages since then (I got off my birth control a couple of times while moving). I really want a baby now and I'm ready for the challenge. I'm so excited and I know my parents are so supportive. I'm even moving in with my boyfriend in his new apartment.