My baby wasn't a fetus, it was a baby, a human being

I had a medical abortion 2 days ago. I was 14 weeks pregnant, and I thought what I was doing was for the best.

I am not in a stable relationship, have no money, and nothing going for me apart from having my 9 year old daughter.

When I went for my abortion my mind was full of doubt at the start, my head was saying abort, my heart was saying don't.

My baby fell out of my womb

I had the procedure done and an hour later my baby fell out of my womb and in to the bed pan.

I saw his little face, (he looked so beautiful and content, but he was not he was dead and I had murdered him).

I didn't want the nurses to take him. I wanted to wrap him up and take him home.

I can't live with myself for what I have done.

I never gave that child the chance in life it deserved and that will stay with me for the rest of my days.

I think abortion should be illegal past the 6 weeks mark, as my baby wasn't a fetus it was a baby, a human being.

Make sure the decision about abortion is talked through and about, don't just follow your head follow your heart please.

This story was sent in on 18/08/2010 and it's been viewed 8,884 times.

Editor's comment

This is such a sad story because as you say you didn't allow your heart to have a voice and this is where your pain is now coming from. I also think that you were not prepared to see what you saw, and at 14 weeks the development of the baby is very obvious.

Everything will be very raw and painful at the moment but in time it would probably help you to have some post-abortion counselling and support to help you to come to terms with what you have been through. If you decide to seek help please find a centre for post-abortion support in your area.

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