After getting pregnant on a one night stand, I was so petrified, I didn't know what to do

I basically found out I was pregnant back in November 2009, after a silly one night stand on my birthday. I was so petrified when I first got told, I didn't know what to do.

I'd made an appointment with BPAS clinic and did not go several times because I was scared, and realising the truth.

I finally went to my appointment and was told I was 19 weeks pregnant

I felt absolutely awful.

I was also told that I'd have to travel to London from Liverpool in about two weeks time, which made me think that I had to tell someone; I'd told my dad in a letter and ran off to my friends scared of his reaction.

My dad called and told me to come home and told me everything was okay. Over the next few weeks we grew very very close and when the day came he drove me there and back.

I remember lying on the bed being put to sleep crying my heart out

It was not for the fact I was having an abortion just due to the sheer fact I was killing something who didn't deserve it.

I lost a couple of friends over it as they did not support my decision, but still have my best friends who supported me in every way.

Then back in 2010, I tried to take my own life because the guilt was starting to kick in. I'm just glad I didn't bring a baby into the world who I could not support at all. I am now finally dealing with it and starting slowly to get over it.

I feel for ANYONE who has to have an abortion. It is one of the most life-changing things you will ever experience.

This story was sent in on 21/03/2011

Editor's comment

You must have been struggling with your decision for a long time, and at 19 weeks it would have felt a very traumatic experience.

It is good that your dad was there for you when you most needed someone to support you.

If you are still finding it difficult to come to terms with what has happened to you I would encourage you to go for some post-abortion counselling so that you can really move on from your experience.

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